Embracing the Awkward
I woke up this morning as my wife was returning from the gym. She worked out with her trainer (let's call him James) who also happens to be our FWB. He's a sexy mid 20s guy with the physique of a Greek god. We're both very attracted to him and he is very attracted to her.
The sexual tension between the two of them is tangible. He and I have a great relationship. In fact, he and I are probably closer friends than the two of them TBH but, he's "heteroflexible" at best, so although he's open to "all-way-play" between the three of us, he's not really attracted to me. When we get together, my involvement is limited, and I'm very much ok with that. Here's why…
I gave AI some details and asked it to render an image of my wife and James. Here is what It came back with…not exactly right, their mouths look weird here, but it’s close enough.
We decided to open our marriage to allow me the opportunity to explore my bisexuality. We wanted to go on this journey together so we decided that bisexual MMF threesomes was the best option (for us) to do that. We have had some amazing experiences but in almost every case, the focus was more on me than on her, so having someone like James as well, is nice because it balances things out. I'm certainly involved, but she gets to be the focus when we get together with him and I love that.
Back to this morning. My wife is a gorgeous woman. I am certainly biased but I'm also not wrong on this one. She's hit on daily by men of all ages. At 48 she's beating the young, hot, 20 something y/o guys off with a stick. She's also an amazing person. She's a successful professional (1% income earner), that emanates a certain level of confidence and strength. She's also humble and extremely conscientious and kind which makes her intoxicating. I say all of this to say that she has NEVER in her entire life, "pursued" a guy. She has always been pursued. She has no experience in being the aggressor. She's also pretty conservative and shy when it comes to this stuff. She's a freak behind closed doors and like a nun pre-school teacher in public.
James is very similar to my wife. He's 25 years old, he is a personal trainer by day and a male stripper at a gay bar by night. He is literally a physical masterpiece. He's one of those guys that women (gorgeous young women) throw themselves at daily. I've seen it first hand on multiple occasions. Like my wife, he has no idea how to be the pursuer. He's the one that is typically pursued. James is also a bit shy and reserved and submissive. He likes to be dominated by strong women and my wife is the definition of that...especially from his perspective as a young man. She's a sexy powerhouse.
Meanwhile, I'm in the middle watching these two gorgeous people awkwardly try to flirt with each other. It's fucking hilarious. Neither of them have any game. His attempt at flirt is to say something like "While we're here in the gym, I'm the boss. Out there, it's all you." It's nice and cute, but seriously? You want to rip her clothes off and that's the best you can come up with? lol.
We have a group text chat. That's where all of our communication happens (for full transparency) and the flirting continued there. I couldn't help but laugh. It was awkward, clunky and super cute. A few times I had to write her responses for her because hers were so corny.
I share all of this to say that I appreciate this aspect of our nonmonogamy journey just as much as I enjoy the sexual aspects. I enjoy watching her smile and feel good flirting with this gorgeous man. It makes her feel nice and sexy and young and desired and that’s awesome. I love her so much. She deserves to feel that way.