Being Bisexual: A Visual Explanation
I’m pretty new to this whole openly bisexual thing and I’ve struggled to explain my sexuality to friends when asked about this seemingly sudden “change”. I’m in my 40’s, I’m happily married, I’ve chased skirts my entire life and since ignorance is bliss, I was happy and satisfied doing it. Since puberty, my attraction to men has always been there under the surface, but even I didn’t realize what it was. What was initially BELIEVED to be simple curiosity, was eventually ACKNOWLEDGED to be legitimate urges. Urges that ultimately had to be ACCEPTED for what they are… DESIRE. I desire sex with both men and women. Thankfully I’ve been “awakened” and I could not be happier.
So here is how I define my sexuality. Any thoughts on how to simplify all of this without misrepresenting anything would be greatly appreciated by the way.
I am a bisexual man and the image below is an attempt at a visual representation that explains my sexuality.
Sex Only Zone
I am sexually attracted to both men and women. Physically, my taste in women is very broad. I tend to lean towards women that are on the thicker side but I find women of all shapes, sizes, ethnicities, and ages to be attractive and sexy. For men however, I have much more specific tastes. Physically, I am mostly attracted to White and Latin men, in their late 20s to late 30’s, slightly scruffy, with just the right amount of muscles. I recognize that this is shallow, and not at all fair to regular guys (like myself) but I’m just being honest. This is purely a physical thing. I can not control who I’m sexually attracted to.
LTR Zone
I only feel emotional and romantic connections to women which means for me, a meaningful relationship is only possible with a woman. Apparently this make me a heteroromantic. If you’re not familiar with this term, a heteroromantic is someone who is romantically attracted only to members of the opposite sex or gender. I don’t know why this is, It just is and I accept it for what is. When it comes to women, looks are important but they are NOT the most important thing to me. I need an emotional and romantic connection. Intellect, personality, stability, EQ, etc are all contributing factors to my sense of emotional: romantic feelings. Without them, it’s a sex only situation.
Friends Only Zone
I can be friends with anyone. Sexual orientation and gender don’t matter to me in the slightest. All that matters is if I like you as a person. Nuff said on that…
Danger Zone
My taste in women is much broader than my taste in men and when combined with my sapiosexual tendencies and because I place such a high value on emotional/romantic connections, I have been tempted into relationships with women that I have little to no physical/sexual attraction to. I’ve fallen for them based on who they are over what they look like. This is a good quality but it’s also risky for me. Without physical attraction, eventually my eyes wander and soon after, the rest of me wanders as well. Obviously that’s not good. (I’m not proud of this. Again, I’m just being honest.) If you’re not familiar with the term sapiosexual, it describes someone who is more attracted to the specifics of a partner's mind than the specifics of a partner's body.